Game Of Thrones – Season 4 -Episode 4 “Oathkeeper”

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“They say the best swords have names, any ideas?”
A Reviewcap By Sagebeth

This new episode of Game of Thrones was packed to the brim with magic, monologues, big puppies, cute kitties, and some quality catch-up time with some of our favorite players. So lets not waste any time and jump right into the article.

THAT TIME MOB VIOLENCE WAS HIGHLY ENCOURAGED
“A single day of freedom is worth more than a lifetime of chains”-Grey Worm being awesome
Grey worm opens this episode spending some quality time with his crush Missandei who is giving him some literacy/language lessons. As she talks he nearly touches his hand to hers but she pulls away. Daario was right – getting ladies is hard when you are missing your man parts. Grey worm has worse issues though as seen when Missandei brings up his birthplace and he shows absolutely no interest in it; in fact the only thing he he shows any future interest in is “kill(ing) the Masters”. Yup. Grey Worm was so extremely brainwashed as an unsullied his own mental freedom only extends to killing all the slave masters. Sigh. He doesn’t even believe he was anything before an Unsullied. Thankfully the handsome penisless Grey Worm gets his time to shine also in this episode so I feel a bit better. Dany has him take point on this mission: Taking Meereen without a battle. In his finest slave-wear he, and some of his best men, sneak into the city and interrupt a super secret congress of slaves discussing what the hell they should do. The argument was leaning toward doing nothing until Grey Worm made his grand entrance and gifting them with weapons. So startith the rebellion. We get some creepy night time footage of a mob of slaves descending on a single master and then we cut to post-battle celebrations. So endith the rebellion?
Seriously I’m in shock that this has happened already but its totally worth it. Crowds of ex-slaves wave their broken collars and chant “Mhysa” has Dany walks by truly embedding her actions as genuinely historic. There is only one more thing left to do on her To-do list and that is providing justice for the many slave children crucified as a warning to her. Barristan urges her to show mercy to all of her captured slave masters but like Grey Worm, Dany is still pissed so she fights “injustice with justice” and has all the slave masters all crucified along the walls of her brand new city. VIOLENCE OF THE WEEK! She stands atop her new pyramid, a Targaryan dragon flag covering the Harpy statue, as she listens to the screams of everyone dying around the city. I’m happy. Dany is happy. Happiness all around – except for the slavers. That last moment was absolutely perfect between the groans of death and Danys contentment.
THAT TIME TYRION AT LEAST HAD A POT TO PISS IN
“That was me knocking your ass to the dirt with your own hand”-Bronn showing how he wins fights
Jamie is practicing using his left hand still in secret with Bronn and it is already showing signs of working – that is until Bronn literally takes off Jamie’s golden hand and slaps him with it. Ha. What a worthwhile lesson. Then afterward in a completely lovely just unpredictable move Bronn lays a guilt trip on Jamie for not visiting Tyrion in the dungeon yet. This is so cool because this is a move Bronn makes without the promise of profit. Does everyone’s favorite sellsword have actual feelings for his boss? Me thinks so. He even brings up when Tyrion was held by Catelyn Stark and when he was to have a trial by combat he named Jaime as his champion, fully knowing his brother would ride through hell to come fight for him. Now Bronn questions if this means Jaime would fight for him now. Man, I love Bronn. Hope this doesn’t mean he’s heading to the end of his road.
So Jaime listens to Bronn and visits Tyrion and they give us one of the most subtly loving scenes ever on this show. There is an old solid comfortable familiarity between the brothers, and Tyrion even quips that they are The Kingslayer Brothers now. Ha. They slightly admonish one another from not trusting in the other: “Are you really asking if I killed your son?” – “Are you really asking if I’d kill my brother.”. Finally Tyrion admits he did not kill Joffrey what the hell can Jaime do to help him? Anyone? Buller? The scene ends with an interesting conclusion: Jamie thinks Sansa had a hand in killing Joffrey but Tyrion rightfully knows she is not a killer – yet. Cue Sansa on Littlefingers boat.
THAT TIME LITTLEFINGER RISKED EVERYTHING TO GET WHAT HE WANTS
“A man with no motive is a man no one suspects,”-Littlefinger being wholly himself
Sansa is wondering where they are going and Littlefinger, always the answer man, tells her that he is taking her to her aunt Lysa’s. OMG Once again Arya is heading toward a reunion with a family member – Fingers crossed they both make it and their aunt doesn’t try to breastfeed them. Also Sansa is still trying to put together the whodunnit concerning Joffrey, and asks Littlefinger to fill her in. He def had a hand in Joffrey’s death even though Littlefinger is one of the few people who Joffrey treated relatively well. “If they don’t know who you are or what you want, they cant know what you plan to do next.” he tries to explain. So Sansa asks him what he does want: Everything. Gulp. I love this dickhead. He then pets Sansa like she is a new pet. Creep. He goes on to reveal how he helped off Joffrey with the help of his new friends: The Tyrell’s or at least Olenna. (DING DING DING I WAS RIGHT IN A WAY). The fake ‘heirloom’ necklace that Sansa was wearing as a gift from Dontos had the poison inside one of the stones and I immediately remember Olenna fussing with Sansa’s necklace while talking about the tragedy of killing people at weddings. Sweet. We transition awesomely to the next scene has Littlefinger utters House Tyrell’s tagline: Growing Strong.
THAT TIME IN THE GARDEN WITH THE FLOWER METAPHOR
“Marrying a Targaryan was all the rage back then” -Olenna Tyrell owning the night
Olenna and Margaery are in their favorite hangout: the Gossip Garden, when Olenna basically lets her granddaughter know that she played a part in Joffrey’s murder. Margeary is super shocked which was awesome. The Queen of Thornes reasoning was basically to protect Margaery from spending her life with that lunatic or “that beast” as she so adorably called him. She eases the tension by explaining how they are very much alike and for as awesome as Olenna was at seducing and charming people Margeary is even better. Talk about a compliment and a half. Basically this is also Olennas farewell as she finds trials tiresome and plans on heading back to Highgarden. Sadface. Hope this isn’t the last we see of her in general.
THAT TIME LOCKE KNOCKED A DUDE OUT FOR AN ENTIRE SCENE
“Hell never learn anything that way”-Why Locke doesn’t hold back
Alliser Thorne and Jon Snow had moment of agreement recently but this week Alliser is back to petty hatred for Jon. While Jon attempts to teach some of the newbies how to fight Alliser interrupts and orders him to empty some chamber pots. Lovely. Janos Slynt, the asshat that Tyrion basically ran out of the King’s Landing for betraying Ned Stark, is one of the few men of station with the power of perception it seems as he has to fill in the acting commander, Alliser, that Jon Snow is very well liked and is going to most likely be in the running for the new Commander of the Black. Nice. Janos suggests sending Jon on his purposed mission to Crasters Keep in hopes of his demise. Meanwhile, we got our sights on a new man attempting to take the black: Locke from House Bolton who was sent by Roose to kill/find/control Jon Snow, Bran, and Rickon. He bonds with Jon over highborn assholes and its sort of lovely. These two working together excites me – Sure Locke wants to kill him but it just seems like so much fun. Also three cheers for Jon’s big inspirational speech and the obvious proof that he would make a hell of a Lord Commander.

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THAT TIME OMG A KITTY!
“So you made a sacred vow to the enemy?” -Cersei questioning Jamie motives and character
Back in Kings Landing Cersei is drinking like crazy. This girl has been upping her wine intake more and more every season and for good reason. It’s amazing because it only makes her listen to her worst instincts and act even worse than she usually does. She bids Jamie to her chamber and proceeds to treat him as a soldier the whole time while suspecting the scary truth: Jamie has changed. She isn’t upset at the rape/rapeyness of their last sexual encounter but rather mad that he isn’t the cocky lover she used to have who would seriously do anything for her. Why won’t her twin who happens to be in love her kill someone for her? Tyrion? Sansa? If he isn’t taking enemy names off her list she has no use for him. She dismisses him coldly when he shares that he doesn’t believe Tyrion killed Joffrey. He’s hurt but he also just semi-raped her next to the corpse of their dead incestual son… Westori problems! Amiright?
New king, Tommen is having trouble sleeping in his new royal bed when every little boys wetdream walks into the room. Margeary, with all of her charm, and silky dress sneaks into his room. I must share that Tommens facial expressions in this scene were absolutely perfect. He is petrified, flabbergasted, and completely ready to ruin his sheets all at the same time. Margeary is all big eyes, and talking about intimate secrets with him as her future husband but their conversation is interrupted when Tommen kitty jumps on the bed! OMG REAL KITTY! This is Ser Pounce (OMG I LOVE TOMMEN) and we get some horrible/amazing story about how Joffrey threatened to kill the cat and feed him to his brother. This leads to Margeary sharing her belief about Tommen not being cruel like him. True. Before leaving, she makes him to promise to keep their nighttime visits secret because Cersei’s head would explode. Also she teases kissing him before planting a quick one on his forehead. Psych! This would be more creepy if Margeary wasn’t a decent person who would most likely make a good queen.

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THAT TIME JAIME STILL HAD ROOM LEFT ON HIS PAGE
“I hope I got your measurements right” -Jamie being cute
Jamie wishes to add to his list of good deeds, especially considering he is the commander of the Kings guard now so in an unexpected move Jaime does something insanely sweet and very forward thinking: He gifts Brienne his new Valyrian sword and a killer set of black armor before sending her on a mission to find Sansa and bring her safely to her aunt Lysa. It seems though he cannot save Tyrion he will do this instead. It’s really amazing. He chooses Brienne over Cersei and saving Sansa over killing her. It gets even better when Brienne says she will do this task for Catelyn and him. OoOoOoOh! Lovey looks are exchanged and it feels so real. Later when she is leaving Jamie gives her one last gift: Podrick smiling like mad! YAY He is saving Podrick by sending him as her squire. These two might be wicked adorable working together. Bronn, joining in, gifts Tyrion’s axe from the battle of Blackwater to Podrick before sending him on his way. One more sweet as pie moment between Brienne and Jamie happens though. Jamie asks about naming the sword and with tremendous meaning she names it Oathkeeper. ::HAPPY SOUNDS:: The unspoken love, and intense respect for one another feels like one of the most true relationships on this show. Ask she leaves we get a clear sense that Jamie believes this is the last time he will see her. Bravo to Nikolaj’s acting because he really sold me during these scenes. The whole rape debacle completely has melted away, especially in light of the horrible rapefest we got later in the episode.

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THAT TIME BURN GORMAN JUST OWNED IT
“Any command for us, Lord Commander?” -Karl asking Jorah’s skull
The Crasters Keep mutineers have been partying like winter most certainly isn’t coming. They are all raping and draining Craster’s supplies: Wine, meat, and daughter/wives. This is disgusting levels of rape that should set the internet on fire but alas complaining about Jaime Lannister raping his sister is worse? Whatever. These poor wildlings have gone from being abused by one angry old man to a whole slew of outlaws. Their leader, the one who started the entire mutiny, treats us with the best monologue ever while surrounded by this heinousness and it is truly a perfect scene of horrors. Maybe it was because I love Burn Gorman who played Karl Tanner but it was so disturbing yet pitch perfect. Really it can be summed up with Karl literally drinking wine out of Jorah Mormont’s skull while talking about his glory days of being a hired killer and fucking the girls until they are dead. Ugh. Seriously this shit got all hamlet on us. After bullying Rast into leaving Crasters last son as an offering to the “gods” we found out they are also keeping Jon’s direwolf Ghost outside in a cage. Praying if/when he gets out he gets to personally kill all of these dudes.
As Rast leaves the crying baby out in the snow for a Wight to come and find, Bran, Meera, Hodor, and Jojen hear it crying from their camp. Meera wants them to stay together but Bran wargs into Summer to go check it out. Summer/Bran doesn’t find the baby first but Ghost in his cage and when they approach Summer falls into a trap. Oh No! So they set out and by sunlight they recognize the men of the Nights watch at Crasters Keep – until they see one of the men get rough with one of the women and Meera rightfully lets everyone know they are in deep trouble and need to get the hell out of there but Bran will not leave with Summer. So Meera prepares to go save the wolf and proceeds to be cold-cocked by one of the mutineers. Ahh! So they drag the kids into the keep and in a move that leaves me truly pissed they chain up Hodor outside and taunt him with weapons. Rast even stabs him in the leg and Hodor falls down looking so hurt. Karl concludes that the kids are highborn and while a sickly looking Jojen has a seizure he holds Meera back threatening to kill her while interrogating them about their names. Bran cracks and admits that he is Bran Stark of Winterfel! What will they do with them? Will Jon make it to the keep to reunite with Bran? Or this yet another Stark reunion tease that will never happen?

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THAT TIME WE WENT PRETTY DAMN FAR NORTH
While Summer/Bran got caught in a trap, a Wight came to the keep and took its baby tribute. So what do these others do with these babies? Where do these others come from? With us least expecting it GOT closes out this episode answering these questions. We watch a icy Wight riding an undead horse carrying the baby further north than we’ve ever seen to some kind of ice haven. He enters a ceremonial looking set of ice stones, like Stonehenge, and places said baby on an ice alter. Another Wight approaches the baby, behind him with see thirteen other Wights watching, proving this event is special. The new Wight appears to be of higher stature than most, wearing actual armor and donning some sweet Darth Maul head spikes or perhaps some sort of crown. He picks up the baby and touches hit old filthy finger nail and we watch as the youthful alive baby’s pink skin turns white and the eyes turn blue. So that is how Wight’s are born. Now to imagine the insanity that is a Wight playpen. Seriously try it.

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~ by ATOM on April 29, 2014.

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