Game of Thrones – “And Now His Watch is Ended” Season 3 – Episode 4 A Recap – By Sagebeth
Game of Thrones – “And Now His Watch is Ended”
Season 3 – Episode 4
A Recap – By Sagebeth
“Influence grows like a weed” -Varys
Who didn’t love this episode? Full of dragon fire, revenge monologues, and Bran falling this episode brought us further into the newest season of Game of Thrones. We lose a major player (whose watch has ended), check out Jamie’s new necklace, get to hear Varys origin story, as well as watch King Joffrey geek out over blood and violence. Really what else could we ask for? Lets jump right into the recap:
THAT TIME JAMIE GOT A BRAND NEW NECKLACE
With his sword hand hung around his neck like a clunky new necklace, Jamie is looking the worst we’ve ever seen him. I can only imagine the horror of smelling ones own hand decaying right under ones own nose. Locke and his men also seem to get off on torturing someone who is utterly incapable of fighting back, teasing that they’ll stick his own fingers from his now dead hand up his ass. Then they debate if Cersei has warmed him up for something like that. I personally find it funny that they think Jamie is the bottom of that relationship but back to the gruesome life that is Jamie Lannister.
Jamie, nearly unconscious, falls off his horse into some mud. Brienne tries to warn his captors, as if they are going to rush to catch him. Of course they let him fall off. He begs for water. One of the men acts like he is going to give him some but he just dumps it over Jamie’s head. Locke, moves forward now like he is going to give Jamie some water but after watching Jamie guzzle down nearly all of it he lets everyone know that it is not water but actually horse urine. Jamie pukes. Locke kicks him a bunch until Jamie does the unthinkable. He steals one of their swords and comes to depressing realization that he can’t even begin to fight with his one working hand. So instead of continuing his half-hearted fighting, Jamie seems to stick to taunting the men probably in hopes they will accidentally kill him, leaving him with a shred of dignity from dying with a sword in his hand. Finally he succumbs to exhaustion, and Locke leaves him with a warning of taking his other hand if he tries that again.
THAT TIME VARYS ACTUALLY SAID ROOT AND STEM MEANING HIS JUNK
Tyrion is meeting with Varys concerning his almost death last year but something even more exciting is going on. Varys is slowly opening a wooden crate throughout the conversation constantly sparking my inner voice to scream “WHATS IN THE BOX!?” several times. While Varys slowing opens his crate, Tyrion gets to his point of meeting him. He wants Varys to help him get evidence on his sister being in charge of his murder plot last season (Blackwater Bay) and he wants to know this fact with more clarity so he can get his own revenging on in comfort. Varys however has no answers only sharing that his sister is blamed through whispers only and he has no idea who actually made the call at the end of the day. While still working on his wooden crate Varys uses this time to continue a story he started on the eve of the Battle of Blackwater Bay. This is the story of how Varys “was cut” or castrated.
Way back when, Varys used to be a slave in a traveling group of actors that went through the free cities. However in Myr he was sold to a sorcerer. Fearing a horrible rape, or however way an older man used a young man Varys is flabbergasted by what actually happens. The sorcerer gives Varys a full body paralyzing potion which left him utterly immobile but very much aware and able to experience pain. He tells how the man cut off Varys testicles (“Root and stem”), as some sort of sacrifice to some sort of god, burning his genitals in a brazier of fire (Lord of Light??). Out of this whole ordeal none of this is what frightens Varys to this day. Not the knife, the man, or the pain but apparently he still has nightmares about a mysterious voice he heard from the fire right after the offering of his genitals. Varys doesn’t know what the voice was or what else happened because around now is when he was thrown out into the streets to die. But this isn’t Varys swan song this is his origin story so all this action did was set Varys on a slow path to power in order to get his revenge. Varys did whatever he could to claw his way up the ladder of ambition and power. He begged. He stole. He sold himself sexually. Increasingly now he began figuring out the stealing men’s secrets was the most profitable of his ventures. This was how a poor slave in Myr worked his way up into the Kings Landing Small Council. This is also why Varys is so anti-magic, hence his immediate dislike of Stannis and his red priestess. After Varys wraps up his tale he finally gets the last part of the crate cover open to reveal: The old sorcerer with his mouth sewn shut. Still alive and seemingly shipped to Varys while eternally gagged the man looks horrible as Varys looks positively glowing with a blood thirst. This is Varys example to Tyrion that waiting to exact his revenge is all he needs to do. He urges him to be patient and let his revenge come to him in time. Then with this he closes the lid on his revenge conquest letting us imagine what lays in store for the man. I love when these two share monologue scene. It screams Emmy.
THAT TIME THEY SHOVLED SHIT – AGAIN
Grenn and Edd, Sam’s-sort-of friends are back to their favorite pastime: shoveling pig shit. Rast, the horrible rat looking man who has been torturing Sam, tells them they should definitely not trust Craster, the same man who sacrifices his newborn male babies to the White Walkers. In Rast’s only smart opinion, what would stop Craster from sacrificing them to his true masters (white walkers)? Grenn and Edd do not want to discuss it because hell their lives are depressing enough right now. A telling bit for me though was Grenn and Edd’s love for the Lord Commander. They always respected him but it seems in Jon Snows absence they like their leader even more – Rast just thinks they think he will save them. If they want to live Rast thinks they will have to look out for themselves.
Samwell visits Gilly again now as she holds her newborn son in her arms. Hilariously after waking the sleeping newborn up, Sam basically asks how the boy is doing and Gilly jumps down his throat for saying “he” when no one should know that it’s a boy. Sam is such a spaz – it’s so cute. He asks if she’s named him – Gilly, probably agonized, definitely hasn’t considering he is most likely going to be a sacrifice to a White Walker soon. She gives Sam back his cutesy thimble he gave her last season saying she no longer cares of such “stupid” things and she is only concerned with her babies life. Can Sam help with that? She doesn’t have time for anyone but the baby and the baby certainly doesn’t have much time right now.
THAT TIME BRAN CLIMBED AND FELL – AGAIN
Bran is back in his mysterious dream-woods chasing the three-eyed raven. Jojen appears out of no where telling him he must go after “him” – the raven. Bran starts climbing the tree – like the pro he is. Once he’s up on the high branch the raven is on Bran begins walking slowly out to it but before he gets very far (ridiculously) Catelyn, his mother comes out from behind the tree trunk all “Brandon what did I tell you? NO MORE CLIMBING” and she continues screaming like a lunatic shaking Bran until he finally falls backward off the branch mirroring his paralyzing fall in the first episode. He wakes up meeting Jojen’s eyes who looks less then pleased with this development. I guess we’ll have to wait and see in future episodes.
THAT TIME VARYS AND ROS TALKED ABOUT PODRICKS SEXUAL PROWESS
Varys also visits Ros who has been secretly spying on Littlefinger for him since he approached her last season. They also continue the whole “Podrick is a sexual-god” theme from last week. Varys, is rightly, curious as to what the hell Podrick might have done to the whores. Ros clues us in that isn’t some Dirk Diggler-huge-wang thing but much more of “how” he used it. When Ros repeatedly asked the whores to tell her exactly what he did they said it was “hard to describe”. She then reports on Littlefinger’s obvious interest in Sansa. Ros think he is obsessed with the girl and wishes to sneak her out of the city when he leaves to go marry his breastfeeding crazy lady wife at The Vale. She thinks this because she stole his ships manifesto and apparently Littlefinger has ordered a second comfy bed for someone other than himself to sleep on. Varys is also impressed that Ros knows how to read and he also knows Littlefinger wouldn’t order a second feather bed for much of anyone other than himself and Sansa.
THAT TIME MARGAERY CONVINCED JOFFREY THAT TOMBS WERE REALLY SEXY
The newest little royal couple of touring what I found out is entitled: The Great Sept of Baelor. On these front steps was where Ned Stark was beheaded for treason back in season one. But now we are indoors marveling at the religious and gorgeous work put into this building. This is also where the royal wedding will be held, hence the tour. Joffrey gushes about the darkest bloodiest memories of the building like an excited child. I mean to say this every week but I applaud this actor for every subtle move he makes. It is breathtaking to watch him get overly excited about a man having his dragon kill his sister while her son watched. Margaery listens feigning an intense interest while Cersei looks on terribly annoyed from behind. Olenna Tyrell is also following the couple, having a telling conversation with Cersei. Olenna asks about Roberts remains, are they at the Great Sept with the rest of the great Targaryen kings? No Robert left instruction to return his body to his original home at Storms End. Olenna muses on the shortcomings of the men in their lives and hilariously Cersei doesn’t take the bait spouting some heinous line about them owning/ruling the world. However this gendered conversation leaves Cersei distracted enough to miss Margaery convincing Joffrey to go outside and see their people. The large crowd, entirely placated by Margaery’s charity work cheers for the young couple. Actually I think they are largely cheering for her but Joffrey is too blinded by people actually celebrating him to notice. Cersei rushes to stop them but too late watches as they wave to the people. Crushed Cersei seems to officially lost Joffrey. Margaery takes home another win and Joffrey falls deeper into a net.
THAT TIME THEONS PLOT SOMEHOW GOT MORE CONFUSING BUT BETTER
Theon and his unnamed savior are moving through the forest trying to seemingly travel to Theon’s sister. The savior spouts a sad tale of watching Theon initially get sent away from the Iron Islands back when they were children. We also learn that the men who were torturing Theon informed him that his father knew exactly what they were doing to him. We also get some inner feelings from Theon as he finally voices his jealousy of his sister and his feelings about his father. He claims he could never be a Stark because he was born to be an iron born BUT cue the sad realization music. He paid the iron price for Winterfel. He also murdered those boys – his savior creepily asks if he means the Stark boys – No. Just some poor orphans that Theon used to get what he wanted, Winterfel. My heart breaks as Theon literally realizes all he gave up simply because he thought he couldn’t be a Stark. Theon calls Ned Stark his real father and admits to making an extreme wrong choice. And now he has burned his hopes and dreams to the ground, much like Winterfel. His savior notes that he hasn’t lost everything yet and beckons him into a room saying his sister is close HOWEVER as soon as the FAKEASS savior lights a torch we see he has led Theon on a crazy roundabout journey right back to his torture wheel. He shouts to the others that he brought Theon back but he killed the others. They beat Theon down as the FAKEASS savior smiles in a sickening way. Now what the hell kind of psychological torment was that?!
Some let me try to straighten this out: Theon is being held by some dudes who are or appear to be iron islanders with a unknown allegiance. Strange fake-savior seems entirely not related to them as he killed a whole group just to convince Theon he was safe with him but in actuality seemed only interested in information. Ugh What next Theon?!
THAT TIME BRIENNE CALLED JAMIE A BLOODY WOMAN
Later on the evening Jamie and Brienne are tied up by a campfire. Jamie refuses to eat because he is just so ready to die. Brienne, suddenly feeling much closer to this douche bag, starts trying to manipulate him into eating by telling him he needs to live to dole out some revenge. Jamie lets her know that is isn’t that easy anymore. The hand currently hanging around his neck was his entire identity and now it is gone. Brienne also reminds us of him saving her the day before from a horrible gang rape – mentioning that her home definitely doesn’t have sapphires much the less a huge wealth of them to pay for her “honor” as he told Locke and the men earlier. She is utterly baffled by his action (so am I a bit) and lets him know about her confusion. Why did he help her? Why did he save her? No answer. Probably because he barely knows why he did it. The same reason Brienne is trying to help him now. A mutual respect for talent and weird interest. Brienne lets her anger show telling him that this is the first time he’s had to live in the real world where things that people care about get taken away all the time and he’s stuck moping around “like a woman”. Though I think Jamie saw right through her manipulation it still worked, as we leave the scene watching Jamie eats.
THAT TIME TYWIN WAS A HUGE TOOL TO SOMEONE OTHER THAN TYRION
It turns out Cersei and Tyrion have much more in common than I ever fully realized. This became apparent to me during a scene between Cersei and their father Tywin. While Tywin is busy writing a letter – which is his primary order of business in Kings Landing (He has to be planning something right?), Cersei starts out questioning his efforts in getting Jamie back (Ugh). Tywin rightly points out that he started a war for Tyrion when he was taken and he hates him so why wouldn’t he try his damnest with Jamie? Tywin also makes it clear that he views Jamie as his heir even though taking a position on a Kingsguard should have destroyed that option. This is also interesting after his previous horrible conversation with Tyrion concerning his legacy, and how he wouldn’t never let his dwarf son ruin that image for him. Cersei points out then that she is next logically choice as heir as the oldest daughter. She also points out that for all his talk about family and their legacy he never includes her on his plans. Jokes on Cersei though because much like her hated younger brother, daddy dearest knows exactly what to say to hurt her. He dismisses the idea of her lady parts getting in the way of him working with her but its simply that fact that she is not nearly as smart as she seems to think she is. Anyone else flat out picture Cersei’s head exploding? I did. Cersei also took some time here in this conversation to point out her valid distrust of the Tyrells – in particular Margaery’s powers of persuasion over the young King Joffrey completely terrify Cersei. Tywin, a true debate winner, bluntly responds that that is a good that at least someone has control over him considering Cersei bloody can’t do it. Cersei says he should try to stop him from doing whatever he wants. Creepily Tywin says he will. Gulp.
THAT TIME NON EXISTENCE BUMPED AGAINST THE DECREPIT
In the gardens Olenna is seated with two lesser Tyrell cousins who are embroidering. One embroiders a Golden Rose as well at the Tyrell family motto “Growing Strong” on one giving Olenna the material she needs to steal this scene. She finds the Tyrells house sigil and motto to be completely boring. She names drops some of the most exciting other options for noble families in Westros: Primarily the Starks and the Greyjoys (“Winter is Coming” Direwolves, “We Do Not Sow” Krakens). This scene only gets better as Varys comes to call on Grandma Tyrell. Shooing the cousins away Olenna has a conversation with Varys in which she sees through al of his bullshit before he gets a chance to completely get it all out there. This was so lovely especially because Varys is sometimes sidelined but never beaten and that is exactly what Olenna did: She beat him verbally. Olenna just barks out for him to get to his point. He came there concerning Littlefinger’s interest in Sansa Stark. With Bran and Rickon presumably dead at Winterfel, and Arya Stark also missing and presumed dead for over a year, Sansa is Robb’s legal heir. How terrifying is it that if Robb were to die the man who controls Sansa will also control the entirety North. Varys also admits to liking working with Littlefinger, or at least their verbal sparring but the idea of the man actually in power frightens Varys. This is because Littlefinger as no limits to his actions if he thinks they will give him more power. He would burn the entire realm down if it meant he could be “king of the ashes”. Olenna awesomely agrees and one-ups Varys by saying the resolution is simple. Holy Transition!
Margaery, working now from this new development goes and finds Sansa praying on the cliffs outside. She engages her in small talk, even jokingly saying her cousin got some kind of pox disease that made her face melt off. Naïve Sansa misses the joke and even calls her self naive when she realizes she bought that ridiculous tale. After Margaery dismisses any listening guards Margaery pitches a plan to move Sansa to her old home, Highgarden in The Reach. Poor naïve Sansa objects saying the Queen would never let her. Hilariously Margaery points out that the Queen regent might care but Queen Margaery totally wants her to go. Margaery even coyly points out her grandmothers obvious solution to Sansa being used as a pawn: Sansa should marry Loras and therefore her rightfully place will be at Highgarden anyway. I’m surprised Sansa didn’t start hysterically crying out of joy here. Between leaving the horrible Joffrey behind and marrying the handsome crush-worthy Knight of the Flowers Sansa might explode from happiness.
THAT TIME RAST STARTED SHIT – AGAIN
At Craster’s Keep tensions and emotions are starting to pile up as the Nights Watch is trying to get back on their feet after their big fail of a battle at the Fist of the First Men. While burning a funeral pyre for a man named Bannon who died from his injuries at the Fist of the First Men, Lord Commander Mormont eulogizes him sweetly talking about a brave man from far in the other direction of the wall, who fought freakin’ scary monsters he didn’t even know existed, and now they will never see that brave man again. He closes the eulogy with this episodes namesake: And now, his watch is ended. Which is a ritualistic ending for all Nights Watch members who die. Rast blames Craster for the lack of food. In fact the men are so hungry that Edd comments that their dead burning companion, Bannon, smells good. Ha.
THAT TIME ANOTHER WATCH ENDED – AND ANOTHER – AND ANOTHER
In the main room of the keep Craster is taunting and irritating the Nights Watch men currently relying on his generosity. Mormont insists they must stay until they are all well enough to travel back to the wall but Craster doesn’t except this. He thinks they should just kill everyone too wounded to travel and if Mormont doesn’t want to do it Craster will do it himself. What a dick.
Owen from Torchwood, named Karl on this, enters now to complain about the lack of real food Craster is giving them. He also inquires about Craster’s hidden larder. Craster now too drunk to sense the danger, continues his hostilities. Rast begins to join in on the frustration here. Craster also says he does have hidden food but he needs it for his many daughter-wives in the winter. Rast calls Craster a bastard to which Craster’s grows extremely angry and threatens him with an axe. Mormont sensing the horribleness about to go down restrains Rast while Craster tells them all he’s going to throw them out into the cold with nothing. He also threatens to cut off the hands of the next man to call him a bastard. A tense moment is created as silence booms in the keep. Mormont begins leading Rast out of the room but the peace is halted when Owen from Torchwood-Karl firmly tells Craster that he is a bastard. A daughter-fucking wilding bastard. Ouch. Craster rushes him but clumsily and trashed so Owen-Karl bests him quickly shoving his dagger into Craster’s throat (yum). He follows up this badass move by making a horrible one: He next punches one of the Craster’s present wives demanding to know where the rest of the food is. Commander Mormont bellows that the gods will surely punish them for this because of a Guests right (a guest killing a host who has formally accepted him into his home breaks the laws of gods and men). Owen-Karl reminds us that there are no rules beyond the wall. Karl continues to threaten the girl so Mormont pulls his sword on him which forces Karl to drop the girl and face off against him. Before the fight can actually happen though Rast literally and figuratively sweeps into the scene behind Mormont and stabs him in the back. Mutiny it is then. Everything slows down as all the men look on as Mormont drops his sword. Then Grenn (Ginger beard as I call him) charges Karl and everything is thrown into utter chaos as Nights Watch fights Nights Watch. Commander Mormont, showing his ball size, turns around to take on Rast with a knife still in his back. Bigger and madder than Rast they fight. Mormont looks likes he’s on the brink of breaking Rast’s windpipe with his bare hand (BADASS) when his back wound finally proves to be fatal as he starts coughing thick red blood and sinks to the ground. Now weak and incapacitated Rast takes the moment to repeatedly stab Mormont in the neck. Too many times to note.
Sam wisely hoofed it out of there to Gilly’s hut. He tells her they need to leave and run now if they plan on being alive to do it. Sam runs out with Gilly and her little boy as the mutiny increases. Anyone else feel wicked bad for Craster’s daughter-wives? I think there going to be “a bit of a rape” for these ladies when the dust settles. Gilly leads the way into the darkness as Rast, covered in Mormont’s blood, goes back to one of his favorite pastimes: torturing Sam. He screams out that his “piggy” can run but he will be slitting his throat at some point. Gulp.
THAT TIME ARYA TOLD THE HOUND TO STRAIGHT FUCK OFF
Back on the road, Arya and Gendry are hooded so they cannot find out where they are going which is the secret headquarters for the Brotherhood Without Banners. Unlike most people I actually oddly trust Thoros when he says they are friends and not prisoners and that it is safer for her not to know where their secret location is. Of course it’s a cave. The Hound is also led in also, still hooded. When they actually take it off he hilariously step away from a fire lit near him. This poor man just needs big hug.
But that’s not what the Brotherhood thinks. They are essentially trying Sandor for murder. We also meet a familiar name but different face as this character has been recast since the first season: Beric Dondariaon. In season one Ned Stark sent him as the leader of a group of men sent to capture Gregor (The Mountian) for crimes he committed in the Riverlands. Wearing an eye patch Sandor reacts to him in a way I wish I could describe…After not being able to pin any actual murders on The Hound Arya speaks up and accuses Sandor of murdering her friend which he did by order of Joffrey. Never the less The Hound is sentenced to trail by combat and The Hound mocks the Brotherhood as to who’s going to nut up and take him on. In a twist fitting on the WWE The Hound finds out he’s taking on….Beric Dondariaon in a flaming sword match next week, live in the creepy cave! It’s gonna be a slobber knocker.
THAT TIME DANY BECAME A BAD ASS.
And now for my favorite portion of this incredible episode. In Astapor Dany is meeting with Kraznys, a slave master, with Drogon, her largest dragon in a large cage to trade him for a slave army. She is also accompanied by her Queensguard (Barriston and Jorah) as well as her new hottie translator who has gotten a wardrobe upgrade. The 8000 Unsullied are gathered as well in the city square where this transaction is set to take place. Other slave masters and upperclass folks watch on, I bet coming to see the dragon, while slaves serve them refreshments.
Kraznys via hottie interpreter tells Dany that the Unsullied have not yet seen battle so she could do with sacking a few towns or cities on her way to Westros. Ha. The slavers will happily take anyone she captures to take as slaves so it’s a win-win to the slavers. Kraznys also wirily notes that any young boys she takes will be trained to be more Unsullied and be full soldiers in about ten years time. Dany releases her Dragon from his cage and carries him flying at the end of a leather leash as payment for her army. She gives Drogon to Kraznys and in return he hands her a fancy cat-of-nine-tails signifying ownership of the Unsullied. Dany asks if the deal is done. It is, though Krazny already looks annoyed that Drogon wont stop flying around trying to pull himself away from the horrible man.
To exclusively Missandei’s, hottie translator, surprise Dany begins speaking absolutely perfect Valyrian to her new slave soldiers. First order of business is taking them for a test drive. She order them to march, and to halt satisfied with the desired results. Kraznys, too distracted by the struggling Dragon above his head, misses this fact and proceed to tell the hottie translator to tell that “the bitch” that the dragon will not come when he commands. Dany makes the best facial expression that says “Well you’re never going to get to call me that again” and then proceeds to speak perfect Valyrian to him informing him that “A Dragon is not a slave” speaking both for her babies and herself as a Targaryen. Kraznys is flabbergasted and questions her aloud about her knowledge of Valyrian. Dany, truly the dragon queen now, declares that she is Daenerys Stormborn of House Targaryen, of the blood of Old Valyria and that Old Valyrian is her mother tongue. Dany had known the entire time all of the horrible insults this douche bag has been flying her way and has used her knowledge to lull the slave master into a false sense of security.
Next order of business is Dany telling all 8000 of her Unsullied slave soldiers to kill EVERY slave master in Astapor, as well as all their soldiers, and any man for that matter holding a whip. In true Dany fashion she says no children and to strike off the chains of any slave they see. There is a pregnant pause here which becomes deliciously hilarious as one of the man lunge out of line to stab a slaver as if to say: Well you don’t have to tell me twice. Kraznys panics and screams like a little girl for someone to kill Daenerys but she turns around and swiftly order Drogon: Dracrays which is High Valyrian for dragon fire. Drogon does his job, engulfing the slaver in flames gloriously killing him. Then Drogon freeing himself with his fiery breath flies up toward the higher walls where other slave masters were watching them – until Drogon burned them up too. Good dragon. The Unsullied proceed to attack as instructed, sack the entire city, supported by all three dragon’s using there lovely fire.
After what I assume is a bloody defeat of Astapor, Dany walks past the charred remains of Kraznys smoking on the ground and mounts a white horse. It’s time for her and her Unsullied to talk again: Though they have literally spent most of their lifes as slaves she is setting them free. No one will harm anyone who wishes to leave but she also asks them to stay and fight for her a free men. For another pregnant pause we are left to wonder how they will react. Do they even know how to react? One of them makes his choice to stay and starts to beat his spear on the ground. Then a few more join him. Next thing we know hundreds of Unsullied are beating their spears on the ground triumphantly signifying a true triumph for Daenerys. Yes. Dany now has exactly what her brother had always dreamed of: an army to conquer the seven kingdoms. She rides out, looking awesome, as her soldiers follow in formation. Also her three dragons are joyously flying overhead. So this is what a true Targaryen looks like. I wonder if they’ll still show Astapor next week in the opening credits on fire like Winterfel.