The Thing (2011) Review

I’m going to be honest, for a variety of different reasons I don’t want to write this review but maybe writing about this film will help justify the money I spent on i-tunes watching this pile of cinematic diarrhea.  I hate to always justify my opinions but I want to preface this review by saying I watched this movie a night after watching the “Fright Night” remake which I love both the original and the remake.  That being said this really has less to do with the source material and more about just being a bad movie.

The movie stars Mary Elizabeth Winstead as an American palaeontologist named Kate who is asked to join a bunch of Norwegian scientists in Antarctica who have discover a deep-frozen alien, along with other non descriptive scientist-y people, couple bearded Norwegian dudes who do nothing and a heroic looking helicopter pilot played by Kurt Russell Joel Edgerton  .  The Alien escapes it’s icy tomb and soon we find out it can assimilate a human host and we realize the alien could be anyone  and no one can be trusted.  This movie is supposed to play as a prequel to John Carpenter’s 1982 Horror masterpiece The Thing, but it really just plays as a direct remake except the film maker is completely inept in building any tension what so ever.  I enjoyed Mary Elizabeth Winstead in Scott Pilgram vs The World but here she’s given the keys to the car and runs it right into a wall.  She’s devout of any character or true raw emotion beside hollowly addressing the cast saying “not all of us are human” and generically screaming as the computer made monster stalks her.

The monster does look pretty disgusting at times but has non of the charm that Stan Winston’s original and more organic looking alien was in the original, proving once again sometimes less is more.  The most insulting part of the movie was it’s conclusion which explores the alien’s ship and a very disappointing climax.  The final scene does bridge the two movies but might leave you scratching your head at how the original is supposed to play out when we’ve just seen what we’ve seen and can’t unsee.  Film maker Mathijs Van Heijningen does everything he can to replicate Carpenter’s vision but really misses the mark here.  It was a vibe and a tone that made Carpenter’s movie such a success and cult favorite, not being constantly beaten  by one computer generated gross out monster after another.  Carpenter’s flick had a 10 little Indians vibe that played on your fear and paranoia, which would then genuinely come out of nowhere to scare the shit out of you.  Skip this movie and watch the original, hell watch The Thing From Another World from the 1950’s instead.


~ by ATOM on March 1, 2012.

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