Monday Night Raw on a tuesday (late edition)

Show begins with “Cult of Personality” filling the arena and CM Punk coming down to the ring, he sits down and begins to cut his weekly promo.  He mentions how he’s different and that doesn’t mesh well with everything WWE.  Punk makes fun of Nash until he finally makes his way out telling Punk that Triple H did him a favor by changing the match but Nash would “kill” Punk.  Punk makes fun of Nash and drops a “Super Shredder” reference which makes me smile.  Triple H finally interupts everyone with his nose and has finally found out the truth about who shot Mr. Burns.  He received stock footage from the Staples Center the night of SummerSlam and we find out who the person who texted Kevin Nash on Triple phone was…..wait for it…..Kevin Nash.  BOOM! my mind is blown across the room. Two Kevin Nash’s what a great ang….wait, oh I get it he texted himself to make it look like Triple H did it, because…uh…he hates CM Punk????  He claims that he helped make WWE cool again (I thought this was like a play on his nickname Big Daddy Cool but it wasn’t) and exciting.  He then tell Triple H that the WWE isn’t big enough for him and Punk and that one of them needs to go.  I’m sorry but even a little kid can deduce in his own mind that this tall funny looking bearded guy doesn’t even have matches, why would he stay over the guy who fights on RAW every week and has been around for years.  Triple H tells Nash he’s gone, Nash antagonizes Triple H and H throws a right hand at Nash putting him on his ass.  (decent bump as well)  Punk laughs as Nash leaves the WWE forever. (this week)

After we see Johnny Ace and Kevin Nash get in a limo and make out. (second part untrue)

Air Boom vs Jinder Mahal and The Great Kali.

Decent match since Kali spent most of the time standing around looking like the Devil in the movie Legend and Mahal taking on most of the offense in which is “OK”.  I would have liked to have seen more of an offensive showing from Air Poof, but they got a good clean finish and the win.

Winner: Air Boom.

Beth Phoenix vs Eve.

Good to see Beth in a match but getting Eve instead of one of the Bella Twins is liking getting Cronic Diahera over Coalitis.  They’re both shitty is what I’m trying to say.  So another shitty Divas match ensues.  Beth wins but really no one wins.

Winner: Beth Phoenix

R-Truth and The Miz come to the ring in a very funny segment.  These two guys play off each other very well, R-Truth playing the Bat-Shit crazy guy and Miz as the straight man.  I’m reminded of how much I used to hate R-Truth as a face when his music hits, but I think he’s been one of the best heels on WWE tv over the last few months.  His feud with Cena didn’t amount to much but at least he tasted the main event.  R-Truth making fun of the name Air-Boom was particularly funny because lets be honest, who doesn’t enjoy a good fart joke every now and then…in good taste of course.  They also decide to challenge Air-Boom at Night of Champions which I think will be a decent match.

R-Truth vs CM Punk.

Cm Punk comes out for what I call the “Meat Match” which usually occurs around the 1 hour mark and eats up a good twenty minutes.  These two guys put on a very solid match up, see-saw back and forth with some inevitable interference from the Miz but Punk does get the upper hand regardless and gets the Win.

Winner: CM Punk.

Triple H interrupts the victory to declare his and Punks match at night of champion a no DQ match.  This is so Kevin Nash can powerbomb Triple H and give Punk the victory. (whoooops!)

A commercial for the WWE network airs as I begin to think about the future conversation that will occur between me and my future wife when this launches.

Jerry Lawler & ??? vs David OTunga and Michael McGillicutty.

I really though they’d be done with these two but here we are.  The King makes his way down to the ring talking about their lack of charisma (Truth) and then says his partner has a ton of charisma. (Holy shit!?) Then a video package begins with highlights from Zack Ryder’s Z-Long Island Story, a youtube series that I do find very entertaining.  Then Zack Ryder comes out and I’m pleased that they’re gonna give this guy a chance.  They literally have nothing to lose.  A quick and enjoyable squash match with Ryder getting the pin.  Good stuff.

Randy Orton vs Heath Slater.

Orton comes out to a huge pop and then Slater follows to also damn near silence, it was pretty pathetic.  This match was pointless and a lot of other guys could have been given an opportunity to get an RKO and lose, but oh well.  Slater hits his finisher the Rock and Roll Boggie-woggie, pins Orton and we’ve got a new champion.  Orton wins easy.

In-Ring Segment.

Cena walks down to the ring while blowing kisses to the fans.  He talks about Del Rio and never giving up, etc.  Del Rio comes out in a pretty sweet Audi and says a bunch stuff that sounds cool with his accent.  Then the ring gets filled with a new stable known as “Random Heels” Wade Barrett, Christian, Swagger, and Dolph Ziggler.  (Del Rio talked to each guy during different segments that I neglected to talk about cause I wanna finish this and watch Breaking Bad.)  Cena is saved by the “the former Heel-fire Club” of Sheamus, Alex Riley, and John Morrison.  This breaks out into an 8 man tag when Teddy Long comes out and says “Listen here players! This is my show and you play by my rules” So he makes it an elimination match which is fun and nothing special all in one as Cena is the last man standing.  Over all a weak start to Raw but I good finish down the stretch.  Truth and Miz gave the best promo and Punk and Truth put on a match worth checking out, everything else was a bit forgettable.  See ya next week Junkers.

Bonus Video

 

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~ by ATOM on September 6, 2011.

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