Monday Night Raw on a Tuesday. (8/29/11)

They were called the Natural Disasters....git it?

After an Earthquake and a Hurricane (close enough) We were treated to a continuation of the story lines leading up to Night of Champions.  So here we go.

The Triple H show begins as he walks down to the ring, He talks about how hard his job is and then he announces that stars of Smackdown will be performing on Raw (for good??) to create the “Raw Supershow” I hate the brand split so I think it’s a good idea if it is the norm, although if you’re a mid-carder on Raw, you might wanna start getting worried.  Then we get into the whole text-gate malarkey which will most likely go the way of he Raw general manager because as the days go on, less and fewer people remember this story line is going on.  Triple H calls out Nash but CM Punk comes down to the ring.  He makes fun of Triple H’s acting and says stop lying a buncha times.  Punk is interrupted by…..THE NWO! holy shi-….nevermind it’s just Nash.  They raided the stock audio and just let him use the NWO theme thus to drown out the arena silence when he walked down to the ring.  H and Nash argue, CM Punk throws up (literally) and it all ends with Triple H booking a Nash vs Punk match at Night of Champions.

Opening Match: Dolph Ziggler vs Randy Orton

Ok I’ve never been a Randy Orton fan, over-pushed, over-rated, it’s all been said, but lately (though his character has not improved) his matches have been great.  Tonight was no exception, a great opening match for Raw with Orton and Ziggler.  Also does anyone in the WWE sell better than Ziggler?  Shades of HBK and Ric Flair perhaps?  Anywho, this match was great, both guys are solid with great timing and Orton figured out another fun way to pull off an RKO.

*note; Before I realized RKO were Orton’s initials, we thought maybe RKO stood for the Randy-Knock-Out, which also could have multiple meanings.

Winner: Randy-KO!

Segment begins with Cena coming down to the ring, he yells about Del Rio having no class, curbs his racism, never quits, and then tells him to come get some (yawn) Instead of Del Rio out comes Mark Henry. *note (Del Rio was in Mexico taking care of Visa issues)  After Henry says nothing interesting out comes Christian who’s mic work might be right up there with Miz and Punk.  He makes fun of Cena whining, setting him up for a great joke and Cena blows it, oh well.  Sheamus backs up Cena thus cementing tonight’s main event weeeeee!

Punk vs The Miz

Last week I said this would make a great program for Mania over the title, well here we are one week later and I will admit this match was kind of boring.  Besides Punk making fun of The Miz’s  faux-hawk , (I like The Miz but lets be real, it’s not 2008 or whenever that awful haircut was “hip”) this whole match kind of dragged, I guess it did have an old school feel and no noticeable botches but it really just failed to wow me…it did start to gain momentum until R-Truth did a run in to end the match.  Punk fights them off until Kevin Nash comes down to the ring.  R-Truth and The Miz join the NWO, Nash powerbombs Punk, they spray paint NWO on his back, Sting comes down from the rafters, Tony Shavonie yells “We gotta go!” and that’s it, Raw ends.  (None of that happened, cept Nash powerbombing Punk to end the segment.

Sin Cara vs Jack Swagger

Could you find any two wrestlers that I hate more than these two boobs?  I don’t care about Swagger joining Vickie’s stable of her and Dolph Ziggler and I dont…DON’T wanna see the WWE give an undeserved push to a guy(s) that continue to botch spots in every single match! I’ve stated before that I didn’t really like Sin Cara but after the last few weeks I’ve had it with this guy.  His character sucks, his music sucks, the lighting is terrible, he comes in is pushed immediately while botching a ton of spots, breaks the wellness policy, gets replaced and then that guy sucks too. Push Tyson Kid and cut your losses.  That being said, this match sucked.

Air-Boom vs Otunga and McGillicutty

Yup, again…(EFFFF!)  This match was not good, these guys were all out of sync and I’m sorry but the David Otunga project is over, get him off my tv.  Borne and Kofi get the win and it ends with Otunga and McGillicutty yelling at Jerry Lawler.  JR intervenes by lighting the announcer’s table on fire and RKO’ing David Otunga through the announcers table.  I know your not stupid but disclaimer: That did not actually happen.  Nothing happened.

Kelly Kelly vs A Bella

I say that as a joke but I really don’t remember…this match sucked, even on a diva scaled measure it was bad. What happened with Beth and Natalia?  Why are they only using them in badly scripted little box promos like in the early 90s?

Winner: Theres no winners in this situation.

Between this and the main event the WWE treated us to another Triple H movie starring H and Michael Rappaport called Inside Out.  It goes without saying that this movie looks like shit, but honestly the trailer was such a mess I couldn’t figure out what the fuck was going on?  It’s like a crime drama, but I think it was supposed to be funny but I cou-HOLY SHIT! It’s Bruce Dern! (Rumsfield from The Burbs) Needless to say Bruce Dern got the biggest pop of the night.

John Cena and Sheamus vs Mark Henry and Christian.

Seemed like Christian carried most of this match, both on offense and defense.  Couple of good spots, five moves of doom, Sheamus and Cena both execute finishers on Christian for the winner.  Decent but forgettable.

To close the show Triple H tells Punk that his match with Nash is off and that it is now Triple H vs CM Punk.  This will be a much better match but who knows where they are going with this.  I’m interested in this story but I think the execution has been poor.  Nash’s mic work has been poor, Triple H injecting himself in the story seems pretty useless unless there is a significant payoff.

Overall a decent Raw with a good start and bad down the stretch.  It’s a long way to Night of Champions, there are 3 more Raw’s before the PPV so still interested to see what happens but they’re losing me again.

See ya next week.

Added Bonus.

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~ by ATOM on August 30, 2011.

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